The silence wraps itself around me a hundred times over. It’s suffocating. I lie still. So so still – not wanting to awaken the monster. My patience is wearing thin. I’m so tired of this. Tired of fighting it. Tired of living with it. Tired of always having to think about it. The pain wasContinueContinue reading “A bump in the road”
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The wait
The clock whirs slowly – so so slowly. Tick … tock …. tick! Silence. That long, drawn, aching silence. My mind rushes to fill that space. “You can’t escape me forever,” it whispers. My stomach flips. I’ve struggled to eat all day – the fear pulses through my body – ripping across it in whatContinueContinue reading “The wait”
Ignite your inner warrior
I’m staring out, watching the world go by. Rushing, racing, living, breathing – life. But I’m struggling. I’m really struggling – struggling to make sense of all this. How this disease can just stomp in and rob you of so much in what seems like a split second. It’s so unfair. Long gone isContinueContinue reading “Ignite your inner warrior”
Acceptance
Ah, there you are. I wondered when you’d show your face again. Clearly we didn’t have enough fun last time. You crept up on me this time though. Not like your last sudden assault 18 months ago. This time you lingered in the shadows, teasing me with strange symptoms that left me doubting myself. ButContinueContinue reading “Acceptance”
Learning to love yourself
I spent most of my life hating my body – hating the way it looked, the way it moved, the way it felt. Then I started running and I thought I’d started a journey to learning to love my body. But I still abused it. I pushed it harder and harder. I could always beContinueContinue reading “Learning to love yourself”
YOLO
Ah, finally – holiday time! Sun, sea, sand – oh, and numb and tingling hands and feet, dizziness, tremors, blurred vision, crippling fatigue. And this is just Ireland. Glad we’ve booked our honeymoon to Alaska now. This is actually my first time sitting on the beach in sunshine since my diagnosis – I’d suspected thatContinueContinue reading “YOLO”
Facing the light
I wrote this post back in December but it’s taken me a while to pluck up the courage to share this. May marks a year since my MS diagnosis and the month of the Pieta House Darkness into Light Walk. I don’t have the words to thank Pieta House for the help they gave meContinueContinue reading “Facing the light”
Bring it on
“We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – toContinueContinue reading “Bring it on”
Today’s rest is tomorrow’s fuel
My running gear is nicely laid out, trainers at the foot of the bed, Garmin watch all charged up. My head is pounding, my legs are full of lead. I stubbornly change, lace up my runners and decide that I don’t care, that I’ve planned this run all week and I will NOT miss it.ContinueContinue reading “Today’s rest is tomorrow’s fuel”
A different kind of marathon
One, two, three, four. Step by step the path flew by underneath my feet. In truth it was probably far more sluggish than that, but I hadn’t been out running in two full months so this felt pretty spectacular. Sure, my muscles and my lungs screamed a bit, but not enough to dampen my euphoria.ContinueContinue reading “A different kind of marathon”
